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Opinion: Albert Cutié: It's time to talk about sex at church - and marriage for clergy
"Maybe having married clergy will help us all move on from a culture of sexual taboos," Albert Cutié writes
January 12th, 2012
02:13 PM ET

Opinion: Albert Cutié: It's time to talk about sex at church - and marriage for clergy

Editor's note: Albert Cutié is an Episcopal priest and former Roman Catholic priest known as Padre Alberto or "Father Oprah." He is the author of the memoir, "Dilemma: A Priest's Struggle with Faith and Love" and hosted the talk show "Father Albert." He's on Twitter @padrealberto.

By Fr. Albert Cutié, Special to CNN

(CNN) – I remember one of the stories shared about an old, revered Cuban pastor in the most popular Roman Catholic parish in Little Havana, near downtown Miami. He was often recognized as an outstanding local hero in the first stop for thousands of Cuban refugees, an area that is now home to thousands of Central American immigrants who also seek a better life in the United States.

One afternoon in the old dark church, 100 or so 7- to 12-year olds from the religious instruction classes known as “catecismo” were preparing to make their Lenten confession. The priest went through a list of the commandments and asked the children to think of any sins they may have committed so they could mention them once they sat face to face with a priest.

He spoke on each commandment for about 10 to 15 minutes. When he got to “You shall not commit adultery," he simply stated, “No hagan cositas feas” - don’t do ugly or dirty things. That was it. The explanation or reflection that had to do with sex lasted less than 15 seconds.

But let’s not blame the old monsignor for his curt approach. When it comes to sex, many Latinos still consider it a taboo subject, especially when there’s a religious component involved. We have the spiciest media, telenovelas, magazines and are perceived as less “prude” than our Anglo counterparts. But when it comes to religion and sexuality, we prefer not to connect the two - and never let them touch. We simply do not feel comfortable talking or dealing openly with sex and religion.

Recently, a prominent Latino auxiliary bishop of Los Angeles, Gabino Zavala, was forced to resign as a result of the discovery that he had fathered two children, now teenagers, while he was a priest and bishop. Of course, this was the result of a romantic relationship, sexual and hidden, with the mother of his offspring. We are in the 21 st century and we still hear reactions like “scandal” and “betrayal,” and some talk of “breaking vows.”

These perceptions are rarely based on reality and have little compassion for what a human being in that situation must have gone through all those years.Those who have no clue of the dilemma are quick to say, “But why didn’t he just leave?” as if it was so simple.

I see some of the same language that I saw from supposedly “devout” people when, in 2009, it became public that I, too, had a hidden relationship with the woman who is now my lovely wife. We are a truly judgmental bunch!

I had the pleasure of meeting Zavala on several occasions since the 1990s, while he was priest and bishop. I know he is a good shepherd and a dedicated servant of the Gospel. I have also met many – maybe even hundreds – of priests, who have been in similar situations, some still serving in the Roman Catholic Church and others who have moved on, like myself. All of these men share the same vocation, love of God and dedication. Yet, not all of them were able to live up to the ideal of life-long celibacy. Does that make them all traitors or bad men?

What is particularly difficult to understand is that while most Latinos say they don’t agree with mandatory celibacy, many in our culture seem to have spiritualized this church law and almost made it a dogma. Why should Zavala be judged any differently than the rest of us? Are we not all sexual beings with the same capacity to love and be loved? Why can’t a man of God, be also a family man? This bishop obviously was also a biological “father” for years, even if we did not know it. Yet everything points to the fact that he was in a monogamous long-term relationship with the mother of his children – who also happened to be a consenting adult. Even the bible says that the bishop should be “the husband of one wife” - see 1 Timothy 3:2.

Cutié: Preaching the Latino gospel in the United States

The cries of “betrayal” and “scandal” in our community also make me wonder why we don’t hear these conservative-minded Latinos speak with such “outrage” when the sexual abuse of minors and other criminal or promiscuous sexual behaviors are discovered and covered-up among clergy. Unfortunately, just as in church, the same thing happens in countless of Latino homes when children are sexually abused by a member or friend of the family; silence and shifting of blame, mostly on the victim, are usually the norm.

It’s like the big white elephant sitting in the middle of the room, yet nobody wants to see it.

The timing seems almost providential. All of this is happening while hundreds of married Anglican (Episcopal) priests are being welcomed by the pope to become Roman Catholic priests - with their wives and children. They will be permitted to be married priests openly, with freedom, and the blessing of the church. Yet, very few tell the flipside of that story, of the hundreds of us who were Roman Catholic priests - many of us Latinos - who are now serving as Episcopal priests and in other religious communities with our wives and families.

Stories like Zavala’s should make all of us, even in our traditional Latino community, reconsider whether the imposition of celibacy for all priests and bishops called to serve God is truly a necessity. Maybe having married clergy will help us all move on from a culture of sexual taboos and help us all deal with sexual issues with greater openness and transparency.

The opinions expressed in this commentary are solely those of Albert Cutié.

Posted by
Filed under: How we live • Latino in America • Relationships • Religion • What we think
soundoff (42 Responses)
  1. Eunjil Bonfigliom

    Hello Dear, are you really visiting this web page daily, if so after that you will without doubt get good know-how.

    July 8, 2012 at 8:14 am | Report abuse |
  2. Conservative Atheist

    Priests do vow to be celibate. And in general, should not be committing adultery. It is very reasonable for people of their community to feel a sense of betrayal when a person who has been preaching morality to them hasn't been following the rules.
    As an atheist, I hear a lot of people moving away from religion, not because of Dogma, but because they feel they have been lied to. Personally, I think that's the wrong reason to renounce your faith, but it happens all the time.
    I can see wanting to change the rules that govern a religion, but to say that leaders shouldn't have to follow their own rules is silly.

    April 5, 2012 at 12:45 pm | Report abuse |
  3. Pankaj

    Bill Scarrott, after hrntiug myself laughing over your post about finding Jesus in places that smell like manure, it occurred to me that after the wise men showed up, there was incense as well.

    February 14, 2012 at 1:48 am | Report abuse |
  4. Tim

    My father was an Episcopal priest for half a century, married for 51 years, and fathered four children. He considered himself to be as "Catholic" as any "Roman Catholic," serving six parishes in three states. It's time that the Roman Church admit that its rules forbidding married priests are just that, rules. There is certainly evidence that some of the Apostles were married, before even the ten centuries in which priest were allowed to marry. Married men in the seminaries and parishes would have eliminated almost all of the scandal issues that have plagued the Roman Church for centuries and would have brought a healthy, more realistic view of family life into the religious community.

    January 15, 2012 at 9:48 pm | Report abuse |
  5. Rushad

    Mr. Cutie questions why Bishop Zavala was forced to resign after his having fathered two children was revealed. The answer to this question is quite simple: Bishop Zavala is a Bishop in the Church of God who not only broke his promise of celibacy, but also sinned against the seventh commandment by committing adultery and fornicating with a woman who was not his wife, fathering two illegitimate children in the process. I fail to see why the resignation part of this story is anything but routine. You can't have bishops whose job it is, ostensibly, to receive the promises of celibacy from priests at the time of ordination, breaking that promise themselves.

    What Cutie protests (and how appropriate it is that he is now a Protestant) is the very notion that lifelong celibacy is required by the Church's canons, and that violations of that law should lead to canonical penalties. His distaste for the Catholic Church is notorious, and he has voted with his feet by joining the sinking ship that is the Episcopal Church. That is his right. But to protest against sanctioning high-ranking clergy for violating their promises is really unbelievable to me.

    January 13, 2012 at 7:37 pm | Report abuse |
    • gerald

      Mr Cutie took a VOW of celibacy. That is more than a promise. He also took a VOW of obedience to his superiors. If he can't hold to these vows what good is his vow of marriage.

      January 14, 2012 at 4:00 pm | Report abuse |
      • Lucas

        YOU NEED TO STUDY what you claim to defend, but are sadly unfamiliar with. Secular or diocesan priests DO NOT take vows. Bishop Zavala and the author of this piece made a promise to the church. It is religious priests and monks who make vows.

        January 16, 2012 at 1:24 pm | Report abuse |
    • Not Disclosed

      Most of the clergy I know of, who are married, are gay anyhow.

      January 15, 2012 at 5:37 pm | Report abuse |
    • Deacon Mario

      Your comment reflects you HAVE NOT READ what Father Albert wrote... He is speaking about the reactions of people when clergy, including Bishop Zavala, fall short of the promise of celibacy. This is a piece about people's reactions and the judgmental nature of some people who cannot deal with realities that occur in the human condition. Stick to commenting on the article at hand and stop your personal attacks.

      January 16, 2012 at 1:22 pm | Report abuse |
      • Tsegaye

        I don't think that legal abortion is in a poeacrirus position...truthfully, I think that's a scare tactic frequently employed. Roe V. Wade will never be overturned.I am of the safe, legal, and rare (it is not rare right now)camp and think that we should be doing everything we can to help people choose to carry. I get frustrated with both sides of this debate because no one ever seems willing to find common ground.And in this election, it is frustrating because it is the same. Both candidates seem to be as polarizing as they could possibly be on this issue.But this is just one issue, and while it would be fantastic if we could work it out, it's not worth voting on this issue alone, as so many from both sides do. Conservatives voted for George W Bush like crazy over this issue and nothing has really changed in regards to abortion. It's still legal and it's still happening at the same rate. Meanwhile people have lost their lives in war.thanks for sharing your story, and your very well thought out post. :)

        September 14, 2012 at 10:07 am | Report abuse |
    • Deacon Mario

      Did you really read Father Cutie's article? At no point does he complain or speak against the Bishop's resignation. The point is the REACTIONS of people who are so harsh in their language and approach to someone who served the church for so long. I also find it arrogant and a bit ignorant that you address a priest as MISTER, just because he is no longer part of your particular church. In our church, we also address our priests as "Rev." or "Father".

      January 19, 2012 at 11:37 am | Report abuse |
      • Fabiola

        Hahaha! LOVE IT! Yes...I had a Priest once swear like a Sailor. Of course, he was a Navy Chaplain-type Priest, so maybe that had hetomsing to do with it! Anyway, my mom was the director of the high school youth group, and Fr Gubbins routinely dropped the F-bomb in front of us! AND once, during Mass...actually, during THE CONSECRATION, he spilled the wine all over the alter and let loose a G-D!!! I about died. But then....another time, right after the procession, when Fr G and the alter boys were bowing at the alter, one of the alter boys bowed into his candle and lit his hair on fire and Fr whacked him on the head with the Gospel to put out the flames....And no....I'm not exaggerating....couldn't make that stuff up if I'd tried!

        April 18, 2012 at 11:22 am | Report abuse |
  6. Fr. John W. Morris

    There is no doctrine of the Roman Catholic Church that requires celibacy for the priesthood. Rome has married priests in its Eastern Rites and recognizes as fully valid the many married Eastern Orthodox clergy like myself. I believe that a married priest is much better able to identify with his people most of whom are married. If nothing else having a wife who can give her husband honest criticism helps keep a priest humble. Celibacy is a legitimate calling, but belongs in a monastery.

    Archpriest John Morris

    January 13, 2012 at 5:55 pm | Report abuse |
    • Matt1618

      Following that logic, Father, let's hope some of your hoped for married priests' marriages will end in divorce (you know they will!) so that the Church can also have some divorced priests who can properly relate to all the divorced parishioners. Throw in some priests who are shacking up with their girlfriends, too, so they can effectively minister to Catholics trapped in that mindless quagmire. Stop at nothing!

      January 21, 2012 at 6:10 pm | Report abuse |
  7. poquimoqui

    Jesus Christ never taught the doctrine of celebacy. It was never part of Christianity until imposed by the ruling councils of the Catholic Church. Paul warns of this in 1 Timonthy 4:3 where he says that there would be wicked men "forbidding to marry". If you believe in celibacy then you place the teachings of some Dark Age priest over the teachings of Jesus or Paul.

    January 13, 2012 at 5:25 pm | Report abuse |
    • gerald

      Yes he did teach celibacy. Check out Matt 19. Peter says to Jesus after Jesus condemns divorce "then it is better NOT TO MARRY". Jesus replies "to some this has been given for the sake of the kingdom". Celibacy is a gift from God for those who chose it and he gives them the grace to live it. You are quite wrong sir. Paul also says that it would be better not to Marry in 1 Cor 7. Rev 14 talks about the 144,000 not defiled by women. Better study your bible a bit harder.

      January 14, 2012 at 4:05 pm | Report abuse |
      • Christina

        I'm a very attractive educated women, and I have been celibate for 3 years. And in my heart I feel no desire to be with a Man. (i'm not gay either) But most people think I am gay since I do not have a Male counterpart in my life. I just don't feel the need for a relationship

        January 14, 2012 at 9:59 pm | Report abuse |
    • gerald

      The Catholic Church does not forbid to Marry. It allows men and women to chose either marriage or celibacy. You twist.

      January 14, 2012 at 4:06 pm | Report abuse |
  8. sean green

    I don't know what is wrong with everyone in this comments section. So much hate. I and my wife both saved ourselves for marriage. We lived happily ever after and now I have a son on the way. We abide by our religious faith (catholic and protestant) and we do our best to do what we think is right. Seems so simple. if you want to be a priest and marry go Lutheran or episcopal. If not stay Catholic. it's the same God just a different bishop.

    January 13, 2012 at 9:25 am | Report abuse |
    • sam

      Saved yourselves, huh? How long did it take you to finally find the right hole?

      January 13, 2012 at 11:56 am | Report abuse |
    • gerald

      Sam,

      which rock did you crawl out from under this morning. The relations between a man and a woman are sacred and your words are profane/vile. You're like a dog in heat.

      January 14, 2012 at 4:10 pm | Report abuse |
  9. Guest

    You say “Recently, an auxiliary bishop of Los Angeles was forced to resign as a result of the discovery that he had fathered two children,.... We are in the 21 st century and we still hear reactions like “scandal” and “betrayal,” and some talk of “breaking vows.” ,,,, He did break his vows didn’t he?I see some of the same language that I saw from supposedly “devout” people when, in 2009, it became public that I, too, had a hidden relationship with the woman who is now my lovely wife. We are a truly judgmental bunch! ,,,,, Yeah, that’s because you broke your vows too!
    Those who have no clue of the dilemma are quick to say, “But why didn’t he just leave?” as if it was so simple.,,,,, Well, you didn’t have any problem leaving did you? Of course, that was only after you had hidden your affair for a couple of years though. But when you finally got caught and the story splashed across the front pages, all of the sudden you just couldn’t honor your vows. Hmmm, you sure gave it a go when you were keeping your betrayal a secret. It didn’t become hard until you got caught.
    You have absolutely no credibility as a priest. Go away.

    January 12, 2012 at 9:09 pm | Report abuse |
    • Rodolfo

      Guest
      You say “Recently, an auxiliary bishop of Los Angeles was forced to resign as a result of the discovery that he had fathered two children,.... We are in the 21 st century and we still hear reactions like “scandal” and “betrayal,” and some talk of “breaking vows.” ,,,, He did break his vows didn’t he?I see some of the same language that I saw from supposedly “devout” people when, in 2009, it became public that I, too, had a hidden relationship with the woman who is now my lovely wife. We are a truly judgmental bunch! ,,,,, Yeah, that’s because you broke your vows too!
      Those who have no clue of the dilemma are quick to say, “But why didn’t he just leave?” as if it was so simple.,,,,, Well,

      I agree with you , this man broke his vows , please stop making money blaming the Catholic Church talk to something different to the american people, because with latin people and american catholics you are burned nobody trust in you, and you disappear in the Miami media and please be clear about celibacy " Latinos say they don’t agree with mandatory celibacy, many in our culture seem to have spiritualized this church law and almost made it a dogma." the celibacy is not mandatory is a free choice to take if you want to be a catholic priest after to many years in the seminary and then to many real Priest live loyal to God and to the Church to be Saints . if you do not like this or you cannot hold your vow to God an to the Church , is your problem go to another church but do not blame the original First Church of God to be a news , why do you always try to support your actions blaming catholic Church ? are you a man of God ? live your life in peace .

      January 12, 2012 at 11:47 pm | Report abuse |
      • Matt1618

        DITTO!!!

        January 21, 2012 at 6:13 pm | Report abuse |
  10. G. Zeus Kreiszchte

    The Catholic Cult is an archaic and absolutely ludicrous deviation of what the Christian religion should have been (though I couldn't give a rat's ar$& about religion, PERIOD!). Anyone who follows this ridiculous cult today is brain dead. Gee, you see no problem with having your religious authorities SELLING indulgences to you idiot followers? Oh sure, it'll convince "god" to grant you leniency in the term you have to serve in "purgatory". HA! And then you'll believe that you're not supposed to have $&x on top of that?! What a bunch of dolts!

    January 12, 2012 at 7:32 pm | Report abuse |
    • Badger

      Now that you got that out you can go change your diaper.

      January 13, 2012 at 12:54 pm | Report abuse |
  11. Reality

    Only for the "newbies" like Father Cutie:

    WARNING!!! WARNING!!! WARNING!!!

    To all us overse-xed h-o-mo-sapiens:

    : The failures of the widely used birth "control" methods i.e. the Pill ( 8.7% failure rate) and male con-dom (17.4% failure rate) have led to the large rate of abortions and S-TDs in the USA. Men and women must either recognize their responsibilities by using the Pill or co-ndoms properly and/or use safer methods in order to reduce the epidemics of abortion and S-TDs.- Failure rate statistics provided by the Gut-tmacher Inst-itute.

    Added information before making your next move:

    from the CDC-2006

    "Se-xually transmitted diseases (STDs) remain a major public health challenge in the United States. While substantial progress has been made in preventing, diagnosing, and treating certain S-TDs in recent years, CDC estimates that approximately 19 million new infections occur each year, almost half of them among young people ages 15 to 24.1 In addition to the physical and psy-ch-ological consequences of S-TDs, these diseases also exact a tremendous economic toll. Direct medical costs as-sociated with STDs in the United States are estimated at up to $14.7 billion annually in 2006 dollars."

    And from:

    http://pagingdrgupta.blogs.cnn.com/2011/02/20/yes-or-al-se-x-is-se-x-and-it-can-boost-cancer-risk/?npt=NP1

    "Yes, or-al se-x is se-x, and it can boost cancer risk-

    Here's a crucial message for teens (and all se-xually active "post-teeners": Or-al se-x carries many of the same risks as va-ginal se-x, including human papilloma virus, or HPV. And HPV may now be overtaking tobacco as the leading cause of or-al cancers in America in people under age 50.

    "Adolescents don’t think or-al se-x is something to worry about," said Bonnie Halpern-Felsher professor of pediatrics at the University of California, San Francisco. "They view it as a way to have intimacy without having 's-ex.'"

    Obviously, Planned Parenthood, parents and the educational system have failed miserably on many fronts.

    January 12, 2012 at 5:30 pm | Report abuse |
    • Ironicus

      Is it true you're an ex-Mormon, Reality? You seem rather uptight about s.exual issues.

      January 12, 2012 at 5:58 pm | Report abuse |
    • Phil

      I love having unprotected intercourse with my wife (I'm 38 and she's 55). We don't have to worry about pregnancy. I love oral too - giving, not so much receiving.

      Who cares what some statistics say - and who cares what this imaginary god of yours thinks. Do what you want to do and live with no regrets.

      January 13, 2012 at 11:33 am | Report abuse |
    • Brio

      So by your own statistics, which are skewed, if everyone used con-doms or the pill, we would reduce the # of unwanted pregnancies in this country (since our teen pregnancy rate is > 17.4%). I note that you don't put the statistics of how using contraceptives reduces those numbers? Also, how do these STD rates compare to previous eras? We probably don't know because your ancestors wouldn't let anyone talk about s-ex. Regarding or-al se-x, ever hear of a den-tal d-am?

      Your commentary just goes to prove that if Planned Parenthood and enlightened s-ex education were more widely used/taught in this country, we would see a decrease in unwanted pregnancies and STD's. Want proof? Compare U.S. statistics to European countries!

      January 13, 2012 at 2:28 pm | Report abuse |
  12. AndyTheGameInventor

    Perhaps it's not my place, being Jewish, to comment on Catholic traditions, but I've always noted that one of the imporant roles of clergy, be they priests, ministers, or rabbis, is to counsel families who are having marital problems. It seems that ministers and rabbis, who are allowed to marry (and generally do) would have a better understaing of the problems facing married couples and therefore be in a better position to counsel them.

    I don't feel that a priest who violates a vow of celibacy with a consenting adult partner has not betrayed his congregration (assuming the partner is not married and in the congregation) because that vow is really a personal one, or a vow between himself and his God, not so much a vow to the congregation.

    January 12, 2012 at 3:03 pm | Report abuse |
    • Ironicus

      Yet his religious authority is based in large part on his appearance of integrity to his vows and the god to which he swore them.
      When he shows himself to be no better than anyone else, where does his authority go? Into the toilet, because he has shown that being an interpreter of the god's words and presence makes absolutely no difference in his ability to follow that god's rules and doctrine.
      When a priest is supposed to be special, and then shows he is not, any claims to special authority fall rather flat as well.
      No amount of declared holiness can be believed when there is no proof of it and only the opposite is seen.

      January 12, 2012 at 6:03 pm | Report abuse |
    • gerald

      When the priest makes his vow of celibacy he makes his vow before the Church. Priestly vows are akin to marital vows in the Catholic Chruch. In a sense he is married, i.e. committed to the church. Yes it is to his congregation. What you are saying is like saying a husband and wife make vows together. The rest of the Church shouldn't care if one or the other goes off and has an affair. You are right you shouldn't commnet on Catholic teachings.

      January 14, 2012 at 4:14 pm | Report abuse |
  13. TCS

    Albert Cutié completely misses the point of the Anglican Ordinate that was set up in England and is now starting to take shape in America. The purpose is to continue to heal the rift that was created hundreds of years ago, while maintaining the rich history that the Anglican/Episcopal church has maintained. Any Episcopal priest that is married may remain so and join into the Catholic Church as a priest by way of the Ordinate. This is also only on a case-by-case basis and it is impossible for any married priest to be bishop. Any single priest will have to take a vow of celibacy to join into the Catholic Church as a priest.

    January 12, 2012 at 2:52 pm | Report abuse |
    • Deacpn Mario

      You do not know the history of the Anglican Ordinariate. It actually started in 1980 with Cardinal Law in Boston, requesting that priests be received with their wives from the Episcopal Church. I know, because we have had a priest in that situation since the 1980's as one of our neighbors. They even suggested that his wife "go to another mass", where he was not presiding...Father Albert has his facts right.

      January 12, 2012 at 9:31 pm | Report abuse |
  14. Emperor Norton

    Do I really have to use goofy workarounds (s.ex) to avoid getting autocensored in the comments for a story that's explicitly about that subject?

    January 12, 2012 at 2:24 pm | Report abuse |
    • Emperor Norton

      Wow. So I do. Nice going, guys.

      Anyway: yeah, this is a good idea, not just within the Latino community but all over America. It's long past time to take the stigma out of s.ex. It's like the entire country, at times, is giggling at the very idea, holding a dirty magazine under their covers with a flashlight; we're permanently stuck in seventh grade.

      January 12, 2012 at 2:26 pm | Report abuse |
    • .

      Ye.s

      January 12, 2012 at 2:52 pm | Report abuse |
    • Ironicus

      bad letter combinations / words to avoid if you want to get past the CNN "awaiting moderation" filter:
      Many, if not most, are buried within other words, so use your imagination.
      You can use dashes, spaces, or other characters to modify the "offending" letter combinations.
      ----–
      ar-se.....as in spa-rse, pa-rse, ar-senic, etc.
      ass-hole.....yet ass is okay.
      ba-stard..as in who killed Kenny.
      bi-tch
      cia-lis...as in Cia-lis(a drug), socia-lism, socia-list, specia-list, etc. (note: this only happens with some email addresses uknown as to why)
      cl-it
      co-ck.....as in co-ckatiel, co-ckatrice, co-ckleshell, co-ckles, lubco-ck, etc.
      co-on.....as in rac-oon, coc-oon, etc.
      cu-m......as in doc-ument, accu-mulate, circu-mnavigate, circu-mstances, cu-mbersome, cucu-mber, etc.
      cu-nt
      do-uche
      ef-fing...as in ef-fing filter
      fa-g
      ft-w......as in soft-ware, delft-ware, swift-water, etc.
      fu-ck......!
      ho-mo.....as in ho-mo sapiens or ho-mose-xual, ho-mogenous, etc.
      hoo-ters...hoot, hootie, and hooter is okay. More than one hooter is bad.
      ho-rny....as in tho-rny, etc.
      jacka-ss...yet "ass" is allowed by itself.....
      ja-p......as in j-apanese, ja-pan, j-ape, etc.
      ji-sm
      koo-ch....as in koo-chie koo..!
      na-ked
      nip-ple
      or-gy
      pi-ss
      po-on.....as in spo-on, po-ontang, harpo-on, etc.
      po-rn
      pr-ick....as in pri-ckling, pri-ckles, etc.
      ra-pe.....as in scra-pe, tra-peze, gr-ape, thera-peutic, sara-pe, etc.
      se-x......as in Ess-ex, s-exual, etc.
      sh-@t.....but shat is okay – don't use the @ symbol there.
      sh-it
      sl-ut
      sn-atch
      sp-ic.....as in disp-icable, hosp-ice, consp-icuous, susp-icious, sp-icule, sp-ice, etc.
      spoo-k
      strip-per..but strip, stripe are okay.
      ti-t......as in const-itution, att-itude, ent-ities, alt-itude, anti-thesis (any anti-"t" word),beat-itude, etc.
      tw-at.....as in wristw-atch, nightw-atchman, etc.
      va-g......as in extrava-gant, va-gina, va-grant, va-gue, sava-ge, etc.
      who-re....as in who're you kidding / don't forget to put in that apostrophe!
      wo-p
      wt-f....also!!!!!!!
      -
      There are more, some of them considered "racist", so do not assume that this list is complete.
      -–
      Allowed words / not blocked at all:

      anal
      anus
      ass
      boob
      butt
      crap
      damn
      execute
      hell
      kill
      masturbation
      murder
      penis
      poop
      pubic
      raping (ra-pe is not ok)
      shat (sh-@t is not ok)
      sphincter
      testes
      testicles
      -
      The CNN / WordPress filter also filters your EMAIL address and NAME as well – so you might want to check those.
      • More than one web address will also activate “waiting for moderation”. Make sure the web address does not have any forbidden word or fragment.
      CNN also has a list of tips on posting comments at: cnn.com/terms/comment_policy.html

      January 12, 2012 at 6:06 pm | Report abuse |
  15. Emperor Norton

    I don't think I'd limit that to the Latino community. It's 2012, and it's long since time to destigmatize sex inside and outside of the religious community. The Puritans who founded this country are long gone, and it's time to bury their attitudes with them.

    Maybe if we were able to discuss the subject openly, honestly, and honorably, the Catholic church wouldn't have quite so many skeletons in its closet.

    January 12, 2012 at 2:24 pm | Report abuse |