Editor's note: See more images from Justin Cook's Commitment NC project on CNN Photos.
By Stephanie Siek, CNN
(CNN) – Despite long-term relationships, shared children and steadfastness to each other in sickness and in health, for richer and for poorer, same-sex couples like Heather McIver and Suzanne Lowe, Kelli Evans and Karen Wade, and J. Wesley Thompson and Trey Owen know that their commitments could be invalidated with enough ballots. They live in North Carolina, which will be conducting a referendum on gay marriage next month.
On May 8, voters in North Carolina will head to the polls to vote on Amendment 1, a proposed amendment to the state constitution that would define "marriage between one man and one woman" as "the only domestic legal union that shall be valid or recognized." According to same-sex marriage advocacy group Marriage Equality, North Carolina is one of 20 states that are considering whether to allow or ban same-sex relationships. Twenty-one states recognize some form of same-sex relationships, either as marriage, civil union or domestic partnership. Thirty states ban same-sex marriage by law, constitutional amendment or both.
Each of the above couples participated in Commitment NC , a documentary photo project that aims to show the faces of the families that would be affected by passage of Amendment 1. It’s the brainchild of Justin Cook, an independent photographer based in Durham, North Carolina, who says he wanted to show the "real love and real lives" of gay and lesbian couples. Commitment NC has also grown to include images and stories from a similar project, Love for All, by another group of photographers capturing the lives of unmarried couples, gay and straight.
Same-sex marriage in North Carolina is already banned under existing legislation, but supporters of the amendment say it's needed to protect the ban from "activist judges" who might overturn it. Conservative Christian groups are among the amendment's most fervent supporters.
Opponents of the amendment say that it would enshrine discrimination against gays and lesbians into the constitution, and would also hurt male-female couples who are committed, but have chosen not to marry. Among those opposed to Amendment 1 are members of the business community, who say that it could keep companies and talent from settling in the state.
Legal experts say that the amendment would also impact the prosecution of domestic violence charges between unmarried partners, and the child custody rights of non-biological parents of any sexual orientation in the event of divorce or death of one partner.
So far, Cook has photographed 20 same-sex couples in long-term committed relationships, and plans to do several more.
Heather McIver and her partner Suzanne Lowe were photographed in front of their church, a white clapboard building in rural North Carolina that is home to the Spring Friends Meeting, a Quaker fellowship. McIver and Lowe have been together since 1993, and they are raising two daughters, 7-year-old Annika and 3-year-old Celie.
For McIver, commitment means "that we have a direction we’re moving in that we still agree on. We share our values enough that we strive to fulfill those values." Those values are shared by the other members of their meeting, who, unbidden, voted to pass a resolution opposing Amendment 1.
McIver said her biggest worries are about how passage of the Amendment would affect her family at its most vulnerable points. They're scenarios prefaced with the words "God forbid" – one partner’s lack of legal ability to make decisions on behalf of the other in the event of death or incapacitation, the loss of the health insurance coverage she has through her domestic partnership with Lowe, a challenge mounted to Lowe’s custody rights because she is a parent of Annika and Celie by adoption and not by biology, like McIver.
Kelli Evans and her partner of 17 years, Karen Wade, have similar concerns about Amendment 1’s potential impact on their family – which includes 3-year-old triplets.
"It could destroy our family unit. That was one of the major reasons we wanted to be a part of (Commitment NC)," Evans said. "I think it's very important to educate people and get them away from the gay marriage issue. If they could see that it's a family they’re affecting, maybe they could sit down and think about the issue before they vote on Election Day."
Evans maintains that the main difference between her family and any other is that hers includes very active triplets – not that she is in a same-sex relationship.
"It's two loving adults that have been together for so long," Evans said. "We decided we wanted to expand the love and bring children into the picture. One of us gets up and goes to work, the other stays with the kids. We bicker about ridiculous things. We’re a family. I'm not knocking on your door trying to destroy your family, so why are you trying to destroy mine?"
J. Wesley Thompson and Trey Owen have weathered intense storms throughout their 25-year relationship, including Owen’s battle with an aggressive and usually fatal form of leukemia. They were married in Canada in 2006, 20 years to the day and hour that they met.
Thompson and Owen say that participating in the project has given them a chance to be positive role models for gay and lesbian young people, showing what a loving, committed relationship can look like.
Owen said it especially bothers him that the pro-Amendment 1 effort is being backed by so many fellow Christians. Owen grew up in a conservative Christian church, and he and Thompson now belong to an Episcopalian church.
"Most gay people I know turn to religion for help, and most of what they find is hate and rejection," Owen said. "Jesus mentioned divorce many times, and never said anything about same sex couples. If the greatest commandment is to love, the church has fallen so short. That's my biggest challenge, accepting that in my heart without me becoming even more angry than I already am about it. The greatest benefit is the hope that we might be doing something that helps change things a little bit for the better."
In light of what happened in North Carolina with Amendment One yesterday, and President Obama's decision today to fully support equality for gay people, this quote below comes to mind. It's my personal philosophy, and, I think, great advice to live by, regardless of your religious background. My spirituality started out as an evangelical until about half way through college and then developed into what I believe is a much more thoughtful spirituality, very similar in fact to those of most of our Founding Fathers. Don't know what that means? Try reading a Wikipedia article on "Deism" for a good start. Many of you will find that our Founding Fathers weren't Christian, at least not in the way people today think of it.
“Do not believe in anything simply because you have heard it. Do not believe in anything simply because it is spoken and rumored by many. Do not believe in anything simply because it is found written in your religious books. Do not believe in anything merely on the authority of your teachers and elders. Do not believe in traditions because they have been handed down for many generations. But after observation and analysis, when you find that anything agrees with reason and is conducive to the good and benefit of one and all, then accept it and live up to it.”
"How many more gay people does God have to create before we ask ourselves whether or not God wants them around?"
state Rep. Steve Simon, D-St. Louis Park
So I guess the people who have relations with their animals will be next in line.
So many of the comments are well thought out and embody a true Christian message of love and support as Christ would have us be. This message transcends the Christ-like message and is reflected in true Islam, Buddhism, Judaism, Native America faiths (read anything by Chief Omaha!), and so many others including a truly moral humanist.
As a member of one of the couples in the article and a member of the body of Christ and this wondrous world on which we spiritual beings are all having a human experience, I applaud all who have commented. Even those whose comments challenge the construct of Freedom of Speech.
Yes, that is true.
Why are the arguments about church in here.....this is against nature. As I said you can have all the legal rights you beleive you need .......but you cannot have the word married.
Check the roots of that word. I do feel it might be the right course of action to do away with all civil marriage and allow the place one decides to worship decide what they should call it. Gay is natural dude. It happens a whole lot in our closet relatives (primates) it appears all the males have fun with other males, but most join with a female. Some do however join with other males. Don't just take the word of someone that is trying to mislead you research things before you call it gospel.
NC education is based on what the preacher says jesus wants not what is legit.All mith & old tales the heck with schools.They are doing the same to the gay people as they pulled on the black people and still are given half a chance......sad jesus would be very sad
Rich... I live in North Carolina. We have one of the trashiest school systems in the country. It isn't ran by a priest, no matter what your yankee self may think. Grow a pair ffs...
I'm one of the people interviewed for this blog post, and after reading the 150 comments (as of this writing), my original comments from the article are sadly enough, proving to be more painfully true than I knew. I can only thank God I didn't meet most of the so-called Christians who have posted comments here! Gay people grow up being taught that we are the lowest form of life on the planet, that family will reject us, society will scorn us, that people will be afraid for their children to be around us. In so very many instances, gay people turn to the church and to God for solace, for love, for someone to help them find a future not so filled with hate. Based on the comments here, I can see how wrong they'd be to do that! Regardless of one's position on gay-marriage, most of those of you who represent a religious perspective here should be ashamed of yourselves and your behavior! You have shown almost nothing but hate and anger. It's people just like you who made me seriously consider suicide as a teen. It's people like you who cause me to struggle daily not to instantly prejudge the driver of every car I see with a fish sticker on the back of their car. Based on these posts, there is not one shred of love in any of you. Jesus called on us to love! That was his most important commandment, and you appear to be failing miserably at it. I thank God I found a loving church home in The Episcopal Church where I know I'm loved even by those who disagree with my politics. I don't hate people like you, but I am very much afraid of you. Based on so many of these comments, you should get great satisfaction from knowing this. Lastly, the good news is that a) one day you will soon find that you are on the wrong side of history, and b) God still loves us despite our short-comings.
Thank you Trey. Your words are beautiful.
Trey, thank you for your post. People like you are the reason I get so frustrated with my fellow Christians, and I apologize for those who claim to share my faith but spew hatred to others. You are absolutely right, there is no reason- no matter what your view on ANY issue- to treat people like they are unworthy and unlovable. We need to go back to following the example of Christ, who spent his time with those who everyone else forgot about, and showing love to those society said weren't worthwhile.
The whole point of marriage in YOUR mind is about man and woman and 'holy' church affirmed ceremonies. The actual point of marriage is to make a legally binding contract between two people who love each other and want to make it official. It has absolutely nothing to do with your church, otherwise Buddhists and Moslems would not be able to marry, the way you are thinking. Keep your narrow confining opinions to yourself. If you want to marry a woman, that's your business. But if a woman wants to marry another woman rather than you (and who in her right mind wouldn't?) that's HER business.
They can have anything but the word.........legal rights to insurance, seeing each other in hospital, inheritance......whatever but you cannot be married. Whatever you want to be called except married.
And who crowned you the keeper and protector of the word "marriage"? I'm straight and I certainly didn't. Its ignorant ones like you that embarress the hell out of the rest of us, and solidify every single stereotype people have about southerners. All I can say thank goodness I don't live ther anymore.
Since you've decided that you get to restrict the liberties of other people I've decided that its my right to walk into your home and restrict some of yours. Don't worry, I'm sure I'll find something that you do that I find personally offensive (while completely and totally harmless) and I'll just "decide" that for no good reason you no longer have the right to do it.
Oh Gawd...Dixie is going to hell in a hand basket. Thanks a lot carpet-baggers.
This is gr8 im glad north carolina is standing up against satan:)
Only if the vote for it. Equality is Christian, Hatred and discrimination is the work of Satan.
Thank you.........this issue has never been won in a vote.......only where 5 judges can be intemidated or bought.
NOT true! NYS legalized gay marriage by a vote in the state legislature, happily signed into law by our governor.
We even CALL them married! Oh no!
Calm down everyone please! OMG! Lets think about this logically. Since when has a marriage been between a man and a man or a woman or a woman. The whole point of marriage is between a man and a woman. Allso please don't say to me how America is about FREEDOM. It has to have rules you know. I mean if America was all about freedom then people could get married to goats and dogs and pigs or 3 men could get married or5 women. AND if it was all about freedom, TSA would not be invading our privacy. I have no problem with gay people but come on, I mean really. Marriage has always been between a man and woman. I personally have no problem with a donkey and giraffe getting together but they can't mate and get married. It's just not the normal way of life. Why do you think God, GODS, ALIENS, or whatever created us put males and females on the planet? Don't you think whoever was creating us had a reason for creating two genders? Well that's all I had to say. Please do not bother to lash out at me and call me names. I am just expressing my point of view just like you are and just like these gay couples are. Good day. (sorry for my misspellings)
Traditional marriage has been a contract between a father and a man for the sale of his under age daughter.
Whatever NC does no doubt the US Supreme Court will overturn it.
Well said, thank you. I really, really don't care what you do in your own home.........and you can have whatever you want to call your "union" except it is not being married.
Civil marriage is a legal definition- so it can be decided either by voters, legislators, or judicial review.
I'am a Christain woman and yes we have very strong beliefs, but regardless of who or what created us we have a Man and a Woman! I have known many of Gay men and women very nice and friendly everyday people. I have no problem with any of you or your choices you make for yourselves; you can do and go as you want. But for me and my family I think it's wrong as a person and its wrong in GODs eyes. I live in North Carolina and I will vote! As a christian, this country has taken away from GODs rules and Laws , students can't pray at school, or wear anything related to God on their clothing, we christians always have to be on gard because satan runs the streets of America!
In america we are at war with each other we gardless of what the current battle is. Pray for one another and that Gods will be done!!!!!!!!!!
Marriage is a Holy Matrimony, it is a Church issue the Government should stay out of it and let the church define marriage. We've got to stop trying to control culture legislatively. If us Christians want to change the culture we need to do a better job at the great commission. This is what happens when you have one sided rights in a country built on developing equal rights. The other side is going to fight for equality. Take away the right in the first place and they wont have it.
Ben, are you doing anything for the next 4 years??? I think you need to run for president!!! Awesome comment and I couldn,'t have said it better myself!!!
Then marriage rights for all or none.
government has no business licensing marriage
They have to be involved in marriage due to the fact it is a legal contract between two people.
Why is it that people (especially Christians) say that it is selfish of these two women to fight to be together, and that they are endangering these children. Those children have two parents that love them and that want to be there to care for them together. They might not have a daddy per say, but what changes the fact some men in general are not with their kids anyway (before you start, I did say some not all). What I find selfish is people pushing their beliefs on others, but in turn don't like to respect someone else.
They can be together all they want...no one is stopping them. They just want to destroy marriages. They can have a civil union or a living will or directed care all the "rights" they want...........but not the word married.
They are pushing their beleifs on everyone else........how is that ok, but our saying no isn't.?? Please explain.
You're right- how could they possibly request to be treated the same as everyone else? The audacity.
When do I get a turn in deciding what rights a group that is different than me should have taken away? I'm sure I could come up with something interesting. Maybe take away drivers licenses from people who have green eyes? Retract property ownership rights from people who own goldfish?
Give me some time, I’ll see if I can find a better minority group to persecute.
what the heck!!!
these are people too...it's selfish people like you that turn this none issue into an issue.
Drop the ridiculous same marriage debate and get on with something more important already. My gawd millions w/o jobs and these are the issues that are being voted on? At least legalize weed we can get jobs out of that and turn the economy around.
except for the fact that, since those couples are gay, they didn't make those kids which means that they got those kids from an orphanage which means that those kids were already rejected once by their two gender parents which means that at least those kids have a home now, or do you prefer that those kids just have to stay in those orphanages until they are 18? And I'll bet you are one of those people that think the reason those kids are in those orphanages in the first place is so that they can scam the system by living off of your tax dollars, huh?
I dont think your assumtion about adoption is correct. I think they had those children with men.
In vitro.... grow up and get down from the soapbox, Ellen.
Notice the CNN story doesnt quote a poll??? Wonder why?? Its cuz "marriage equality" is going to be defeated by 20+ points and CNN doesnt want to report that inconvenient little fact. If "marriage equality" was leading, CNN would be only too happy to quote the poll.
The only thing I've ever learned from a church pew is how to judge and hate. It wasn't until I left that vicious, ignorant world and met LOVING people (such as those who will be hurt by this law) that I found God. I am from NC, orginally, and I am typically very proud to say so; but the fact that this law is even being given serious consideration in my home State shames me. I thought we were better than this.
Have men had a good look in the mirror. So many straight men over 35 have paunches, unkempt beards, ugly hair cut.s and tasteless clothing. Clean your self up, take a shower every day and brush your teeth so you can get a woman to look at you with love in her eyes. Right now WOOFER you have no right to comment on anyones body.
tell me what you accomplish by making horrible remarks to these innocent people who have raised what seems to be a healthy normal life loving family? absoulutly nothing... you'll get yours in return some day and when you do i hope you remember all the horrible things you've said to innocent people, and hope you feel 10x worse then you made these people feel.
At first I was going to type a long, drawn-out response about the sheer volume of other countries that allow gay marriage and haven't gone up in fire and brimstone, such as Catholic Argentina, but then I realized that I'm in the USA.
I kinda wish we could all just get along! I really could care less who marries who! It's none of my business! There's ah old saying If it doesn't effect me and mine get over it!
Why are Christians always so poisonous and full of hate?
Why do stupid people like you generalize?
I think Jesus said "Turn the other cheek," not lash out with an equally hateful response.
You do realize "Pug Mom" that you prove Andy's point right there? He generalized, but you spewed hate…so how far off is that generalization…?
There is separation of church and state in this country. Some of us have faith, some do not. Religions are particular facets of interpretation of one bible. Read it for your self and don't be dictated to by a leader of a religion. If you believe great, if not fine – God did give us all a choice. And what this is about is the right to have a choice. Who am I to judge another's life? Or to tell them what they can or cannot do? I am a Christian and a minister and I try to be Christ like. He teaches to love one another, we are NOT to judge. If you have Christian values, then pray and do not cause strife. Trust God, hold your tongue. Do not let your opinion and words soil your faith and give people reason to turn away from God. And if you do not care to believe, please consider those who do and allow them to have their own choice. Let the people vote, separate church and state, and let your voice be heard by casting by a ballot instead of scornful words.
I wish they had a 'like' button on here instead of report abuse...you would receive so many likes for your answer!!!
I can't understand the attraction one man has for another but it also has no affect on my life whatsoever if two men or women want to get married. If two consenting adults love each other and want to get married in THE LAND OF THE FREE then who are you to tell them they're wrong and destroying the world when clearly they are not?
What I wanna know is how those two large gentlemen in the photo had triplettes?
You can just shut your hateful mouth. I know those women, and they are wonderful people.
she said gentlemen...not ladies. She must have been talking about a different photo.
Oh i bet u know them well too;)
"What I wanna know is how those two large gentlemen in the photo had triplettes?"
Guess you missed this lesson in grade school. Emotional maturity is defined as: the ability to express one’s own feelings and convictions balanced with consideration for the thoughts and feelings of others.
That post was hilarious...lol
I'm still laughing at the "two large gentlemen"...lmao...straight up comedy
Gay people cant deal with the fact that most people disapprove of their lifestyle.
Your a minority gay people, get over it.
And in a free society of democratic values, majority rules.
And the majority is against gay unions.
Gay marriages make the U.S. a laughing stock in the eyes of the civilized world....
I don't, and no one I know does. It sounds like you're the one with the problem.
"Gay people cant deal with the fact that most people disapprove of their lifestyle."
No they don't. The experts around the world have proven that being gay is not a choice, not a mental illness, and it can't be voluntarily changed. Only prejudice and bigoted people think the way you do. Plus there are now 1000's of gay churches, gay clergy, pastors, rabbis, etc that have stated being gay as we know and understand it TODAY is not a sin.
I agree, if they don't like our religious values our code of ethics and our straight and normal lifestyle they should leave our country, they need to stop pushing their unnaturalness upon our lives and our children's lives, thats the real reason this country is going down the drain, Maya I think you should go to church and repent your sins.
I agree with ya Brother Will, preach it my man!! In the beginning God DIDN'T create Pamella and Josephine, or Steve and Larry, He created one MAN & one Woman named Adam and Eve.
You must be one of Fred Phelps cult members.
"they need to stop pushing their unnaturalness"
The experts have proven it is totally natural you've been proven WRONG! Only prejudice people would state something that is actually not a fact. You know the saying prejudice is built on the foundation of ignorance.
I don't care what the experts say, God Almighty calls it a sin.
"Maya I think you should go to church and repent your sins."
Being gay as we know and understand it today is NOT a sin. Part of reading comprehension 101 is you actually put it into historical context.
"I agree, if they don't like our religious values our code of ethics and our straight and normal lifestyle they should leave our country""
God does not regard homosexuality as a sin any more than heterosexuality. Sin is lack of respect for God; it is a lack of love or respect for other persons. Whether gay or straight, therefore, one may sin against God or others. But God forgives us when we sin and strengthens us in resisting sin. We are led by God's forgiving love to become more respectful and loving toward God and towards others, even those we don't "like".
The Scriptures are very important because they teach us God's love for all, gay or straight. But the Scriptures are old, thousands of years old, written even before the word "homosexual" existed. Same sex acts involving the genitals – we call these "homogenital" – seem in Scripture to be thought of as a result of idol worship. See, for example, Romans 1:18-27. Nor do the Scriptures seem to understand what we mean today by "sexual orientation". Sexual acts which are injurious, disrespectful, or unloving toward the other person are wrong. So I believe that the Scriptures approve of homosexuality and even homogenital acts that are kind, generous, loving, and respectful of the other person, just as in the case of heterosexuality or heterogenital acts.
And you can't deal with the fact that you are the minority and that the majority have no issue with everyone being able to enjoy marriage.
What is with all the hate towards gay people?
What is wrong with being gay?
DONT INCLUDE THINGS LIKE: ITS WEIRD OR ITS AGAINST MY RELIGION. Think beyond religion and weirdness
Laughing stock in the civilized world? You mean places that feel about gays the way you do? You know like Iraq, Iran, Afghanistan, Syria, etc?
"Gay mariages make the US the laughling stock of the civilized world".... You have obviously no idea what goes on in the rest of the civilized world my friend.
Gay Marriages and Unions have been legal or is underway in most other civilized countries including Canada, Australia, Spain, Argentina, Mexico City, Belgium, Netherlands, Norway, Iceland, South Africa, Sweden... If anything, the US is the laughing stock of the world for dwelling so much on the issue and at the same time calling themselves the "land of the free".
Thank you JCO
Rights are inalienable- that means it doesn't matter what the majority thinks. If it's a right, then you don't get to obstruct, legally or otherwise.
Why should we change 4000 years of marriage law for a fringe group?
Why should we keep a law that's been around for 4,000 years? You either change with the times or die, that's a basic rule of life. The world and society is not the same as it was 4,000 years ago. You cannot rely on a bronze-age book of fairy tales to guide your life or society's laws. Stop trying to cling to your fictional god and the laws of the past. Otherwise you are useless, you are an outdated fossil who has no place in modern society. I'd rather gays have the right to marry than you have the right to live in a pile of ignorant filth.
Don't assume those against this are Christians. Every major religion is against gay marriage and so are hundreds of thousands of people with no belief system. We won't die as a nation if this isn't allows since its a very, very small population to start with. Going from one extreme to another in the comments on here, doesn't really help them.
No one is gonna die if we dont let Bert and Ernie marry.
Alternatively what life will be created from these gay unions? None.
The vast majority of "arguments" against gay marriage I've seen and heard have come strictly from a religious standpoint. Basically "my holy book/god says it shouldn't be allowed so nobody should be allowed to do it." Or "it is morally wrong because my god says so."
I have yet to see any secular argument against gay marriage. It is very much a RELIGIOUS problem.
But gay unions serve no biological purpose.
They just serve the selfish desires of those people, and what people want isnt always right, now is it?
Beam48: "We won't die as a nation if this isn't allows [sic] since its a very, very small population to start with."
So you're suggesting society kill gay people because if they all die it is only a very small population to start with? I'd suggest that if such a small percentage of the population wants to do things differently, it should be ok because it couldn't have all that much of an impact anyway. Also, are you suggesting we should only do things when we are threatened with death?
Jimmy Bill and Steve: "But gay unions serve no biological purpose."
So what? Until you call for the nullification of any marriage/union that proves to be incapable of producing natural children your point is invalid.
Yes I am a Christian, and believe that Gods Commandments can't change otherwise God ceases to be God. Same sex relationships have civil partnership.. a legal recognition endex for me .. Marriage is between Man and Woman, Adam and Eve as it was. Redefining marriage is just wrong. Adam and Eve were in essence married.. but to let Man and Man, woman and woman say they are married.. No. These relationships can't ever be marriage. Its like redefining an Apple as now an Orange.. this cannot happen. I'm sorry if this upsets, but as commandments can't change.. this can't change.
"Every major religion is against gay marriage and so are hundreds of thousands of people with no belief system."
That is completely not true there are thousands of gay churches in America, there are clergy who are actually marching in protest on how the gay community is being treated. There has even been written letters of apologies from clergy to the gay community too!
The experts around the world, hundreds of thousands of them have shown that being gay is not a choice, it's not a mental illness and it can't be voluntarily changed, being gay is normal and natural to human sexuality.
"Yes I am a Christian, and believe that Gods Commandments can't change otherwise God ceases to be God."
That's why there are so many thing in the bible that are considered an abomination that are legal today and not frowned upon by the church. The only reason people use this excuse is to validate their personal prejudices and hatred. What a bunch of hypocrites.
I believe the same argument was used by those who wanted to retain legal slavery.
So marriage law hasn't changed in the last century? Or the last millennium? Or since 2500 BCE?
Click ... Next!
There are many things that are 4,000 years old that should not and are not around today. I wonder if one of the arguments of slave owners was, "Well, we've been owning people for years- why not stop now?" And a fringe group? The gay community is large and established. Please educate yourself before voting on an amendment that both destroys loving families and casts the "Land of the Free" in an unfavorable light to the rest of the world.
Well since money talks in our society - every gay person should move out of the bigoted states, not visit, vacation or spend any form of money in these states. The redneck states would soon realize exactly what they have done. They will accept gay money as long as they do not have to recognize who the money actually came from.
Since less then 4% of the population is gay, I don't think that would have much of an impact.
We don't need yo redefine a family after 5000yrs. Its been just fine
Yes we do because the experts proved that everything written about gays in the past were done by bias and prejudice people. It's why the laws in this country are changing. They have proven being gay is not a choice, it's not a mental illness, and it can't be voluntarily changed. They deserve the same civil rights as straights.
You're in luck then, you are covered under the Americans with Disabilities Act. Anyway that's your tough luck.
Oh yeah, totally fine...more than 1/2 end in divorce despite the claim that marriage is sacrosanct. Just ask Newt.
That's right James, let's use the definition of family that was in existence 5000 years ago. What does that look like? Well, if I recall a man could have multiple wives and they were considered chattel. Marriage was more about property rights and inheritance than any kind of love or desire for a relationship. If a man were wealthy enough he could literally have a harem. And those wives could have maids/servants. If one of the wives didn’t want to perform her “wifely duties” she was able to send in her handmaid as a surrogate! Also, it was considered ok to offer your own daughters up for your neighbors to “know” if they threatened your guests from out of town. Oh, and what about the thing where if your husband died you had to marry his next youngest available brother? I’m still a little fuzzy on that. Oh, and divorce – don’t get me started. Seriously, the take away from your 5,000 year argument is the idea/definition of family has seriously changed over the years. It is the 21st century, not 2900 BCE.
"Let's Pretend" taken to extremes..
Yeah pretending there is a god when there isn't one is tearing our society apart.
marriage is for a man and a woman
anything else is an abomination
hahahaha, Jesus is posting!!
The experts around the world disagree with you.
Only to bigots like you. Some of us actually don't get offended at the thought of two loving people getting the same tax benefits as the rest of us.
I agree letting kids grow up in a gay household is not healthy or normal.
They just get teased into suicide, happens everyday...
Afraid you are going to have to do better then that..those were written for believers..in this case the Jews. Most Christians do not follow the hundreds of Jewish laws.
"Most Christians do not follow the hundreds of Jewish laws."
And they don't apply to gays today either.
"I agree letting kids grow up in a gay household is not healthy or normal.
They just get teased into suicide, happens everyday..."
Actually the experts have proven you wrong. "Social science has shown that the concerns often raised about children of lesbian and gay parents—concerns that are generally grounded in prejudice against and stereotypes about gay people—are unfounded. Overall, the research indicates that the children of lesbian and gay parents do not differ from the children of heterosexual parents in their development, adjustment, or overall well-being
"They just get teased into suicide, happens everyday..."
That happens to straight kids too and more of them kill themselves than gays, so by your logic we need to outlaw straight marriage too. I hope you don't have children your prejudice is not based on facts and you are a terrible role model.
of course not...why would Jewish laws apply to gays..unless they are Jews?? My point was trying to use Old testament laws against Christians that don't even follow those laws makes no sense at all.
It is NOT a human right- it is a relationship right you do know the difference don't you? I have certain rights with my doctor, lawyer, or priest than I do with my mechanic, butcher, or babysitter does that mean the mechanic, butcher, ect are discriminated against bc they don't have the same rights as the lawyers or doctor?? I don't get how people claim the gay community is discriminated against- everyone of them can vote, work, pay the same taxes, ect- WHERE IS THE DISCRIMINATION??? Marriage for over 10yr has been tied to reproduction- if you got a women pregnant you were suppose to marry her, also up until recently most marriages were arranged- love and feelings had nothing to do with it, so stop making this about 2 people who just want to be together bc who cares if 2 people want to be together. How would a civil union affect gay people huh? Having gay marriage states that marriage has nothing to do with reproduction- yet for 10k yr it did- it basically says reproduction is worthless and has no value as it is equal that the impossibility of reproduction. I’d be for a civil union but not for gay marriage.
So, what about people who can't naturally reproduce on their own? Like myself, many other women are sterile. By your logic, we shouldn't be allowed to marry? Or is my value as a woman only tied to whether or not I can reproduce?
And this was directed to Sumday. Sorry!
That's all the religious people see when they see a woman; someone to serve a man and have children. Read the comments above for examples such as the loser calling them "heefers" (whatever those are) because they don't look like the standard version of "perfect women" (Barbie doll).
How do you not understand the numerous legal benefits to couples and families (yes, omg, some gay couples are raising kids! gasp!) that legal marriage brings? Where do you get the gall to restrict gays/lesbians from enjoying the same rights you have? If they don't have the same rights, they should at least get to pay less in taxes.... or never be required to serve on a jury should they just simply choose not to... or maybe they should be forever exempt from the draft.
Now if we could teach monkeys how to type using upper and lower case, that would be progress!
Why people continue to go out of their way to encode bigotry into secular law is beyond me. What a sick, disgusting mindset to go through life with.
Self-righteousness is the simple answer....where the self-righteousness comes from is a longer conversation. :-)
Whats wrong is people going throughout life with no rules or morals for themselves or others. Just because you want or desire something does not make it right. What I have seen reading theese post are not Christains attacking the Gays; its the other way around. Don't judge us because we try to live a Godly life....
No one is keeping YOU from living your life... but it would be nice if you didn't restrict others' rights based on your extremely old "holy" book.
I live in NC. I'm hoping that the hatred and dysfunction that exists in today's Christianity does not result in passing this horrific piece of legislation. We are not backward here. It's not Mayberry. This legislation, if passed, will cement North Carolina's reputation as a bunch of backwoods idiots. And Jerry's comment says "...two men cannot make a baby." (OH, REALLY??? AND THAT HAS TO DO WITH...WHAT?) It's that kind of statement that makes me worry for the future of the universe.
The universe will always continue on even after the dissolution of humanity, however the stupidity of many people in this country is definitely hastening the day where there will be no humanity left.
People's views and what's acceptable in today's society has changed dramatically over time, but God's word will never change. That is one thing that we can count on in this crazy, upside down world.
for the record not everyone in this world believes in your god!
"God's Word" changes all the time, which is why we have hundreds of denominations of Christianity alone, and each of those changes significantly over the decades. Even 2000 years ago there were dozens of Churches each with their own versions of scripture.
Neeneko, God's Word does not change. Man Changes God's word. If you sit down and read the Bible, that is God's word.
People's views and what's acceptable in today's society has changed dramatically over time, but Thor's hammer will never change. That is one thing that we can count on in this crazy, upside down world.
God had no issues with one man and 500 wives and concubines. Are you good with that?
Have you ever read what the Bible says about SLAVERY? Have you? If you believe everything in the Bible, then you would have SLAVES! Newsflash: Everything in the Bible CANNOT be applied to today's world. We have evolved. Too bad you haven't.
You know Amy,
As a conservative Christian, I used to think the same way, that all people should live by biblical morality. But then I realized, my opinion in a democracy should not be enforced on other people. If we were living in Iran or Sudan, yes, God's words (or Allah's words) are laws, and any deviance should result to death. Fortunately, we are living in a democracy, where all are endowed by Almighty certain inalienable rights, chief among them: life, liberty and pursuit of happiness.
Thank you! It's folks like you that redeem the Christian reputation by acting like Jesus. Bravo!
Oh my dear Amy Sue, if only that was truly the case however over history, the church, the bible, and the ceremonies thereof have indeed changed significantly and dogma may be hard to change but it has changed many times in the past. Your narrow world and historical view is exactly what is the problem with religious people such as yourself.
Amy Sue, which one of God's Words are you talking about? The ones written in Aramaic, Hebrew, Greek, German, or English? If you're looking at the New Testament, then God must have been speaking in Aramaic because, as far as we know, God has spoken to no human since the time of Jesus. So, where and when did you learn Aramaic? And PS: God has spoken to people since, but I highly doubt you would consider any words of the Koran to be God's word, even though it is.
"but God's word will never change"
The god in your bible does not condemn the saved loving Christian gay couple. What the bible does condemn is male prostitution, idolatry and rape.
Religion is one of the leading causes of war and death throughout the history of the world. Seems like that makes the world a pretty "crazy, upside down" place to me.
First, we do not know "God's Word", because apparently he never learned English. Thus, whatever language he spoke has been translated and re-translated. So it's better to pick out a translator and more accurately state that John Smith says God said.......but then, who wants to believe John Smith? Then there is the matter of the New Testament, which does not appear until 40 years after Jesus's death. You can imagine what 40 years of oral storytelling can do to an original version, so you must also exercise care. The folks I will not trust at all are the ones in this blog who "know" what either of these gentlemen said or meant!
Not every one believes in god
or some dont agree on the word of god
Give them what they want and all that goes with it and then everyone shut up about this.
Actually, then the next fight will begin. Other groups will then also want their rights, and we will get to see how quickly gay rights groups turn on their allies once they have what they want.. sadly, the temptation to go 'see, we are normal just like you, we hate the same people you do, and do not like the REAL perverts!'
CNN never has any articles in support of the traditional marriage view.
Is that surprising? There's already support for traditional marriage, even among the gay community....the sad truth is that the support is not reciprocated.
If there is ever a major effort to ban traditional marriage, I'll agree with you that there should be coverage about it.
BINGO QS ... totally correct.
And which tradition would that be? It has changed many times over the last few hundred years already.
Traditional Marriage? You mean the kind where women as seen as possessions of the men they marry? Or the kind where parents choose who will be married? Or do you mean 'your' definition of traditional? Traditional marriage as most would define it currently has been in existence less than a hundred years.
Which traditional marriage are you speaking of? The one where a man may have many wives? The one in which a wife and children are nothing more than chattel? or the one that says you cannot marry outside of your race? Marriage is a contract between two parties. If two people want to enter into a contract – it doesn't concern you.
Why does it both you so much? You're still just as married even if Bob and Joe down the street also got married.
Perhaps that is only because idiots subscribe to that viewpoint.
I truly hope that North Carolina wakes up and recognizes what should be termed as simple human and civil rights. The GLBT population has been treated as second-class citizens for long enough! We are the same as everyone else, we pay taxes and have the same happinesses and sadnesses as everyone else. Please just let us be able to marry the person that we love and plan to spend our lifetimes with. Is that SO much to ask for?
Yes, it is.
Do you know what I don't get? We treat taxpaying citizens as second class citizens and tell them they can or cannot be married, but we support health care for illegal immigrants and their entire family? We provide welfare to UNMARRIED baby mommas as well. As someone that is fiscally conservative, but socially liberal (I walk a fine line!) this really ticks me off! Let them be married? Who are we to say?
I hope your state will not show discrimination. I know an amendment was intrudenced here in Wyoming like that but the Legislatures here voted it down and we continue to accept all marriage certi.s.
What does this have to do with the topic? So tired of spammers. The penalty for eliminating one should be a five dollar fine or 5 min community service.
there it is again. religion rearing its ugly head into people's personal lives.
Jerry is doing what most religious people tend to do....assuming that morality and religion are synonymous, but they are not.
How is it then that so many people feel they can decide for themselves what's 'moral' and what's not? Some folks believe it's ok to cheat on their taxes because the government just wastes the money. Some folks believe it's morally ok to grab the money that falls out of a bank's armored car. Some folks believe relations with a child is moral as long as the child doesn't mind. You see, God sets the standard for morality because mankind cannot; or will not.
Actually Jerry, we do have those standards- they're called laws.
@Jerry- because some people can think for themselves. Because some people do the right things out of empathy, understanding or altruism. Because some people are good regardless of a threat of hell. Obviously you are an adulterous, thieving murder at heart and the only thing keeping YOU in line is your magical mystery man in the sky. Very sad. You obviously need to fear a myth to keep us all safe. Stick with it, please! Let those of us who understand how acting in a moral way benefits society as a whole do so without your book and bogeyman.
justice has nothing to do with religion!
You confuse morals with religion. Religion does not own morals. People can survive just fine without your RELIGION. Are you such a simpleton that without your RELIGION, you will STEAL AND KILL? Give me a break.
Idiot. What you said has nothing to do with anything. We are all more stupid for reading it.
Thanks Jerry, plainly and simply put, but poignant. We should not stress though, let them sin, and let God deal with that sin. I
have sinned as has everyone, but I am not here to judge. What, I do believe is that upon resurrection, God will deal with each and everyone of us. What you can't do is continually ask for forgiveness and stay in that sin. The point of God's forgiveness, is that we have learned and moved away from that sin.
So are you saying that YOU want to kill people and steal things and cheat on your spouse, but religion won't let you? Maybe the police should be keeping an eye on you then. You just confirmed the "religion rearing its ugly head" comment a thousand times over.
Jerry, just because you're religion is able to forgive sins doesn't mean that without it everyone would be as barbaric as you describe.. there are other religions in the world besides your own-open your mind.
No_Name: Who are you to say what's barbaric and what's not? If you can decide what's moral and what's not, then so can I; right?
It is an article about a photographer taking pictures of the couples. So, where are the pictures? As far as relationships go, people should be able to do what they want. Enough of the churches trying to dictate everybodys' lives for fun and profit.
Is anyone from North Carolina badmouthing Obama's statement on the Supreme Court, because ethat would be amusingly hypocritical. Why doesn't everyone mind their own business and let people be happy with whoever they want to be happy with? If you want to break people up because it makes you feel uncomfortable, you are a bad person.
Yeah, the women in that picture look really happy. Let's adopt a bunch of kids with no father in the home... This world is full of idiots.
Yeah, maybe they look unhappy because bigots are threatening the legal validity of their unions. That's something to cheer about isn't it?
my mother was more of a father than my birthfather or stepfather, ever was combined!
It will be interesting to see how the divorce rates are among the men when there are no greedy mothers in the picture. Their marriages will likely last much longer.
How do you sleep at night?
You sound like an idiot. Just FYI! At least those children have a loving home and are being taken care of. It doesn't matter who does the raising and loving that child. That's all that should matter!
@sameseeker: Right, take mothers out of the picture and humanity would die off because two men cannot make a baby. It's biologically impossible.
@Jerry- but two men CAN raise children. It's people like you who drag us back to the Middle Ages. How does it feel to see your ignorance become more and more fringe/unacceptable? How does it feel to know your grandchildren will speak of you in hushed, embarrassed tones. "Well, I guess we can't blame grandpa, he's from a time that just couldn't understand". You are the old guy who still says "coloreds", aren't you?
and why don't people stop trying to change a tradition that dates back to the first human civilization? In all of human history marriage has always been tied to reproduction. Most marriages were arranged- so love and emotions had nothing to do with it. Sorry but I'm not willing to let go of 10 THOUSAND years of human tradition bc some people feel left out. I'd support a civil union that grants them all the same rights, but marriage is bt a man and women. let gays have a civil union tradition for 10 thousand yrs and then let someone come and tell them to change it and see how they feel. I'm from NC and will be voting against it. Call me any name you want bc of that, but honestly I've probably been called worse by a better person.
Sumday, marriage has changed quite a bit. Why can't it be changed a little more?
Way back when, marriage was a contract between families. Family A sells their daughter to Family B in exchange for money, land, or property. Family A gets someone to help continue the family line. It is all about trading property and power.
Now, marriage is for love in most situations. Back then, the notion would be scoffed at.
Yeah, why are people cruising the internet at all?!?!?!? It used to be, that if you wanted to know the weather, you WENT OUTSIDE. It used to be, that if you wanted to learn something, you opened an encyclopedia. Now, people find out anything they want to know on the Internet. It used to be, that people talked to each other! Now we just write ignorant comments on news websites! I say that anything new is bad!!!!!
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